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Baggage. For those that don't know, emotional baggage is the term used for the idiosyncrasies we develop from our past relationships. Everybody has them, but everybody carries them differently. A show-stopper with one person could be a minor annoyance with another. So I'm thinking that the airlines have the right idea on how much baggage to allow in your
This blog does not condone or endorse inexplicably large head wraps. Via YouTube
The industry standard for air travel is to allow one carry-on bag on board per passenger, generally at no charge. This is because the plane can only handle one bag per person. They have size limits on the bag, but don't specify what brand or color the bag is. If it doesn't exceed the size limit, you can bring it with you. This ties in with emotional baggage.
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For example: You just had a very messy break up with your significant other, you are very hurt by the things that happened during the relationship and led to its demise. At the time of the breakup, your emotional baggage is at it's highest. If you were to begin another relationship, the new person would have to deal with all these unresolved issues that you have with your ex. This will lead to the new relationship failing, as it never truly stood a chance. As time passes and you begin to get over the things that your ex did, you start removing the emotional baggage that you carry with you.
Don't be like Luna
Like I mentioned earlier, everybody carries their baggage differently. Some people have been able to live through very traumatic events and have been able to move on from it and not let it continue to affect them. Others...not so much. That's why, like the airlines, you shouldn't look so much at the type of baggage, but rather the amount and how they carry it.
Now, there are a few special cases that will negate what I just said. I have been quoted as saying I wouldn't seriously date a woman with a child at this stage in my life because I don't feel mature enough to deal with it (I said "seriously date", I never said I wouldn't casually slap a booty with some stretch marks on it). More examples of special cases can include but are not limited to STD's, criminal history, porn career, Tea Party member, etc.
One carry-on is generally acceptable, anything more than that starts to get rough. Just visualize somebody walking into the airport dragging a carry-on, a large suitcase, wearing a backpack, while trying to hold a duffel bag. As you get to know someone, you may be able to identify what kind of baggage they have. Once that's done, you can avoid certain topics or actions that will cause problems. When you have significant other with multiple issues, you now have a minefield that you have to walk. In the event that the person doesn't have one major issue and just has a collection of smaller issues that can fit in this theoretical emotional carry-on (which, realistically, is common in its own right), it can generally pass.
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Remember, you make the final call on the baggage you will or will not accept. There are always exceptions, special cases, & concessions to almost every relationship rule. As you begin getting to know a potential significant other, you will have to decide what you can and cannot deal with. Some might tell you up front what baggage they carry with them...with varying degrees of accuracy. Heeding what they shared, you still should expect more than what they've told you. If they tell you that they only have that one bag, and you see them trying to roll a few extra bags in right behind it, you should address it, communicate your willingness, or lack there of, to manage it, and govern yourself accordingly.
How do you feel about the one carry-on rule of thumb? Do you not consider children to be baggage? Can you accurately identify your own baggage?
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